PAINTED PAVEMENTS

EDWARD HOPPER & PAVEMENT

Good colours and shit.

More good colours and shit.

Aight so yo. My friend who likes art and shit told me about Edward Hopper and I've been looking at a few of his paintings this evening. They're pretty tight. I like the colours and the shading and shit. 

Good shading and shit

Now while you recover from that statement that just turned the whole world of art criticism on its head, i can tell you about the song I've grown to love this evening. 

A few months ago i was playing the song 'Here' by pavement in my car wherever I went (24-hour Mcdonalds, Corner shop, 24-hour KFC, middle-of-the-road-shop, seventh circle of hell, library, 24-hour petrol shop). Its really good. "HERE" it is below (jokes for days.)

So I've dabbled in some pavement before (if that sentence gave you an image of someone looking really shady and periodically scratching and sniffing real world pavements then congratulations! GreAt MiNds ThInK Alike). 

Moving on, I came across a new pavement song i really dig, so maybe you should listen to it too. It's called Blue Hawaiian- Blue like the colour and Hawaiian like someone that comes from Hawaii- the U.S State that's basically a bunch giant volcanoes. 

Getting back to the song, I like the kind of sporadic melody that changes up, and the catchy chorus where he changes pitch. Here is my best written impression of said catchy bit. ("youknowyourcheekshavelostheir LUSTer" and "the notesaregroupedin CLUSters.."). Because that has probably not gotten you, avid 4 readers, any closer to knowing how this song sounds, I'll just post it below.

Scarlett Johansson.

BOOK - BOOK OF LONGING

BOOK - BOOK OF LONGING 

Aight so yo. My introduction to Leonard Cohen came from that real good song Hallelujah- a song that Jeff Buckley, in my humble opinion, made better, and then Alexandra Burke in what should be everyones opinion, made worse. Then my friend dropped this book through my window one day (not as weird as it sounds I promise) and i started to read it (because that is what you do with books). Its a collection of Cohen's poetry, some short prose, and his crazy but cool drawings. 

(crazy but cool drawing)

There's no general plot to outline here- Well there might be but i didn't read the book cover to cover, i kinda dipped in here and there until i read the whole thing (there goes my internship at any and every newspaper reviewing shit). But the important thing is that its pretty sick. If I took this blog seriously I'd try to find my own way to describe this book properly, but the 'Independent' (Newspaper, magazine, secret society?) pretty much sums it up perfectly - "Cohen maps the wasteland of the heart with humour, and sometimes anger". In my defence, I could add something- go for the rule of three and say humour, hostility, and sometimes anger (i'll make editor one day Mum).

There is a pretty awesome combination of short but emotionally charged poems (notably 'Sweet Time' and 'The Sweetest Little Song'), with longer and more expressive pieces where he says cool shit like 'I am the voice of suffering and I cannot be comforted' ('Something From The Early Seventies). Speaking pretty simply, it just makes it kinda fun to turn the page (remember, I'm a barrel of fun) or dive it at random, because you never know what type of poem or entry you're going to read, or how Cohen's going to leave you feeling. Content with a beautiful simplicity, inspired by a moment in his life, or (for me at lest, pleasantly)  saddened by one of the darker entries.

He says some real cool shit in there, with a mixture of simplicity and complexity that lead to equally profound and poignant realisations. 

Plus there are drawings of titties and vaginas and butts. 

5 JEAN-CLAUDE VAN DAMME'S OUTTA 5!

FILM - FAR FROM HEAVEN

Film - Far From Heaven

Aight so yo. I was sitting around doing nothing like the studious student I am, eating my petrol station chicken and bacon sandwich (that tasted nothing like chicken or bacon) looking up suggestions for films similar to revolutionary road. I was doing this because revolutionary road is really good. So I came across 'Far From Heaven' - a film set in the same depressingly perfect American suburbs where everyone hates everything but has to pretend not to (sort of). 

Oppression, repression, suppression, and loads of other tragically interesting -sions pop up in this film. The focus is on Cathy and Frank Whitaker (Dennis Quaid, and Scarlett Johansson Julianne Moore) a seemingly perfect couple raising two kids in a 'charming' little neighbourhood. Frank has a great job as an executive at advertising company 'Magnatech', while Cathy sits around at home, cleans, and chats shit with the other mothers in the community (they like to talk about how many times a week their husbands give them the D). Everything goes tits up though (i still to this day do not understand how 'tits up' can be considered to be anything other than amazing) when Cathy goes to take her late-working husband some din dins. She catches him passionately kissing some other dude in his office instead of doing his Home-o-work (jokes for days). But seriously now, this obviously takes her by surprise and though you get this immediate feeling that their relationship has been fucked up beyond repair, they both agree that Frank will go to Conversion therapy. That's where psychologists psychiatrists psychics and psyborgs (jokes for days) try to turn homosexual people into heterosexual people. 

Meanwhile, Cathy strikes up a relationship of her own that's frowned upon by the community she lives in. Raymond, Cathy's large black gardener provides her with relief and intellectual stimulation in a tumultuous period of her life (Although it seems to me that he puts the moves on her from day, but perhaps to more educated movie-goers and watchers their relationship is one that blossoms from platonic to something that is  tantalisingly close to erotic). Anyway, without spoiling the ending (Cathy's racist homophobic psychopathic brother kills everyone) the film follows Frank and Cathy's dance into the depths of 1950's America, its prejudices and stereotypes, and its suffocating way of life; you get to see how elusive happiness can be, and the part society plays in always keeping this happiness just out of arms reach.

Raymond, here to trim your hedges, save you from marriages
that are being torn apart by secret homosexual desires, go
to art exhibitions with you, change the way you think
about abstract art, AND lay the pipe down.
Top that cracker.

I liked it. Its a morbid downward spiral that keeps your attention and has interesting developments and some  really believable emotional moments. When I first started watching it though, it all felt really surreal- twin peaks surreal. Kinda like the actors knew they were acting, maybe that's intentional and something to do with how living that life is an act anyway, or maybe it was me just being a little drunk. These surreal vibes never really went away though, and a lot of the lighting in tense scenes is reminiscent of 'Dick Tracy, private eye, Noir type flicks. This isn't bad though, in fact it actually makes the film look pretty cool. 

My general interest in the myth of the hollow american dream really drove me to this film, and kept me watching. If you're like me and you like depressing films about unfulfilled potential, mid-life crises, and broken homes and lives ( what a barrel of fun i am) then I think you'll like Far From Heaven.

3 MARK ALTHAVEAN 'SISQO' ANDREWS OUTTA 5 

DOCUMENTARY - SEARCHING FOR SUGAR MAN

Aight so yo. I was lurking on Facebook wondering why everyones life seems so much more exciting than mine, and i stumbled upon this documentary. Then i watched it. Now im writing about it cos it was quite good. 

Its about this dude named Rodriguez and his musical endeavours in the late 60's and early 70's. Some music guys find him in a smoky burnt out Detroit bar, playing with his back to the audience all mysterious like. So it goes that they sign him and he releases two albums, and these albums flop and he's kinda reabsorbed by the smoky clouds that spawned him. The thing is though, that the songs he put out were all pretty decent, with lyrics on par with, if not better than the huge singer songwriters around at the time - Bob Dylan and the like.

His music makes its way overseas however, specifically to South Africa, he becomes the soundtrack to rebellion against apartheid. Basically he's da man over there, and everyone has his record and digs his music. But no-one knows who the fuck he is. This prompts two guys to look for answers, and to search for Sugar Man. The documentary details their attempt to track down Rodriguez, and to find out if the rumours of his extravagant on-stage suicide are true.

The thing about Searching For Sugar Man is that the story completely carries itself. Aside from a few cool animated shots, and interwoven archive footage, its just a straight up interesting story. A multitude of key figures, musicians, and studio execs are interviewed and each segment strengthens the mystery surrounding a guy who was "Bigger than the Rolling Stones" in South Africa, but as famous as someone like me (or you- prick).

The fact that the music is pretty tight also helped me enjoy this documentary, and his tunes are systematically incorporated into the flick, throughout its duration- they really help you to get a feel for the kind of voice this guy had- and its a good one. 

Without spoiling the ending (they all die en-route to South Africa, tragically) its definitely a story that has genuine weight, and quite an amazing finale, with everything being tied up quite nicely; the basic mystery is solved, Rodriguez remains somewhat of an enigma. I want to say its heart-warming, but i don't have a heart and heat makes me queasy.

4 OL'DIRTY BASTARDS OUTTA 5

FILM - MIDNIGHT IN PARIS

FILM - MIDNIGHT IN PARIS

Aight so yo. I seen a few Woody Allen flicks before and they're usually pretty cool. The whole breaking the fourth wall talking to the camera shit in Annie Hall, specifically this one  (click click click) kinda builds this rapport with the audience that you don't get in a lot of other movies- It's like a neurotic charm that hilarious as well as intriguing. Midnight In Paris doesn't have characters talking to the audience through the camera and shit, but it contains the same sort of disdain for pretentious shit-chatters and its always fun to see people who love to talk get told to shut up - in more words and in a clever way (fight the power). 

Movin on, a struggling Hollywood hired hand goes to Paris with his wife (who's a bitch!) for a break, and to attempt to finish his work-in-progress novel. The Wife has her parents there too (who are also dicks). Then there's this dude called Paul  who takes the role of the shit-talker mentioned earlier. There's this opposition between struggling human intellectual Gill (Owen Wilson) and Book and lecture memoriser Paul (Dick), and the film does a decent job of steering you towards supporting the character of Gill and wanting him to do well and shit. 

So Gill's this dude that, like many of us, thinks he was born in the wrong era. The past seems like a much better place, in terms of nearly everything. Crazy parties, bitches, art, and a sense that people gave shits about stuff. His destination of choice would be Paris in the 1920's (Mine would the year 2000 anywhere near Scarlett Johansson when she looked like this, so i could become best friends with her, protect her from the rigours of teenage life, and systematically weasel my way to her heart. At this point I would dig in my claws and not let go for hell nor fire. I think i just made that phrase up). 

One night Gill goes for a walk, a clock strikes midnight, and a olden time car magically transports him back to the 1920's where he meets the likes of F. Scott Fitzgerald (and his drunk bitch wife Zelda), an intense Ernest Hemingway, Pablo Picasso, and Salvador Dali (played by Adrian Brody) who likes rhinoceros' and saying his name in a funny way. These late night/early morning rendezvous help Gill overcome the artistic challenges of being a writer (like knowing what to write about and how to sound and shit) and they help him out with some more personal stuff and shit. These cameo-like appearances are pretty fun to watch. The whole notion of looking back on things with Rose-tinted glasses, and letting the present slip away (My man) is explored, and it comes to a pretty tidy conclusion as Gill experiences a kind of eureka moment in the 1890's. Without ruining the ending (they all die), the film finishes leaving you kinda satisfied, even though there's a bit that's kinda corny but kinda alright about walking in the rain and shit. 

For me, the whole meeting great literary figures and artistic genius' is kinda cool, and sometimes pretty funny. The emphasis on humanity and feeling over the straight up check-out-how-many-books-i-have-read knowledge makes me feel good about being a shit student, and the film shows Paris looking pretty pretty too. The only downside is the lack of a Scarlett Johansson. But thats alright.

3 ROCK BOTTOMS OUTTA 5!

FILM- AMOUR

Film - Amour

Aight so yo. This film won the Palme d'Or at the Cannes Film festival last year, which is basically like completing 10 seasons of Master League on Pro Evolution and winning everything (which i did) .. (twice)- Because initially only a few people get to see it/care, and its too complex for everyone else to understand/no-one gives a shit (haters). Seriously though, films that get that accolade are kinda hit and miss with me. I can fuck with Apocalypse Now (1979 winner) Pulp Fiction (1994) and The Wind That Shakes The Barley (2006), but some of them go straight over my head- Tree Of Life (2011) Four Months Three Weeks and Two Days (2007). Sometimes they are too ambitious, too pretentious, or just not that entertaining. I kinda feel everything great is entertaining in some way, even artsy films that invoke some sorta deep thought cuz that's entertaining and interesting for me (And people say i'm not fun?)

So Amour. Its pretty sick. Amour means love, and the film kinda flirts with the idea of love, what it means, and to what extent it can push you. Nearly all of the film takes place in the apartment of this ageing married couple, so it's all tight and claustrophobic and really human. To cut an old story young, the wife is gradually deteriorating, and its all sort of the husbands fault, because he pushed for a surgery she never wanted (Guilt -My Man). Initially, their relationship is full of charm. Living in their apartment we see dinner time conversations that hint at enduring love and excitability even in the twilight stages of their life and marriage. Gradually, the wife's deteriorating health places a financial and emotional strain on the husband, and we get a real first hand look into the pain of watching a loved one slip away. Without giving away the ending (they all die), I can say that its a pretty honest, brutal look at emotional and physical decay- that whole drag of the mortality of humans and how it sucks dick.

It made me think about love and marriage and shit. Thought-provoking films are pretty sick, and when i finish watching something and think about who's right, what i think about what just happened, and other deep and meaningful shit i can never really say i didnt enjoy it.

Although this did happen, and i found it hilarious. Which then made me sad because it's quite a poignant moment and i missed that.
(full screen it, and apologies for the shitty copy)









Minus the hilarious-but-not-really face slapping, I thought Amour was pretty brutal, pretty honest, and pretty sick, if not a little heavy going. The ending raises some pretty interesting questions too, about selfishness and selflessness, and the real limits of love.

Yo i was gonna go for the 3.5 on this but that slap bumped it up...

4 CAPTAIN & TENNILLE'S OUTTA 5

MUSIC- XXYYXX

Aight so yo. Triangles eyes tongues conspiracies Illuminati Numbers add up to corrupt governments, totalitarian states, the loss of civil freedoms and the end of the world. Shut up.

I'm pretty sure this albums out soon/already/never,  but definitely at least two tracks that are pretty sick and I'm listening to right now. Dope beats, with that funk cowbell, trap drums and nifty vocal loops. 
I cant stress the funk cowbell enough.
FUNK COWBELL. My Man.

Witching Hour and Closer